The Need for Approval from Others

"You must begin to trust yourself. If you do not, then you will forever be looking to others to prove your own merit to you, and you will never be satisfied. You will always be  asking others what to do and at the same time resenting those from whom you seek such aid." Author unknown When we are growing up, we are constantly told what do by others. Other people shape us and teach us about the world and ourselves. Rarely are we encouraged to listen to ourselves: our hearts, bodies, and minds. We are taught to value other's opinions more than our own.

Trusting ourselves is, therefore, something that doesn't come easily, and loving  ourselves is almost impossible, because we seek to please others and not ourselves. Just think, if we were all to take individual responsibility for our own lives and our own happiness, then there would be no need to call anyone else selfish, because we would not be dependent on others to make us happy or to validate our worth.

Lou Holtz, the great football coach said, “If you desperately need people to like you, you will never have their respect. You must be willing to tell people when they do not meet the standards of excellence and you must be willing to correct their mistakes. You must be willing to look for the things people do right. More importantly, if we catch people doing things right, that will motivate them and make them enthusiastic and give them the passion to do the correct thing.”

Holding people accountable for their actions is an important step in leadership. Building people up to become what they can become requires accountability. A person cannot become what they can become when they do anything halfway. When a person does not do their best, they not only cheat other people, but they cheat themselves.  Everyone loses out on something that they can get of value from you.

The best way to become the best you can become is to be of service to others. So what does lead to success for people?

1. Have passion for what you do.

2. Persist and work through all of the rejections, critisisms, and people that will tell you you will not succeed.

3. Be good at what you do.

4. Listen and observe others and solve their problems.

5. Serve others something of value.

The best way to get approval from others, is to give others approval. A leader isn't good because they are right, they are good because they are willing to learn from others and to trust others.

Be WUCA!(c) to others. Be Welcome, Understand, Comfort, and Appreciate!